4 Years Since My Diagnosis: A Short Retrospective

It’s been four years since I was diagnosed with breast cancer on March 11, 2021.

This is the first year I didn’t write or post something on my diagnosis day, but it’s not like I forgot about it. It’s not something I could forget even if I wanted to.

On March 11, my husband and I traveled to San Francisco. I was heading in for my work offsite, and he traveled with me to work remotely so we could have a little vacation time together over the weekend.

After we settled in at our hotel, we grabbed delicious bowls of ramen, then went for a leisurely walk from the Ferry Building down to Pier 39. We bounced around a few shops at the Pier, visited the sea lions, grabbed coffee, and headed back to the hotel for the evening. It was a beautiful day filled with sunshine, laughter, and the salty wind blowing through my hair.

My hair.

My hair that I lost almost fully while undergoing 13 grueling months of treatment for my unbelievable breast cancer diagnosis. My hair that I cried about losing probably even harder than initially hearing I was diagnosed with cancer. My hair that I now have again, my life that I now have again. A life so beautiful and full of experiences that I can only be grateful to God, modern medicine, and the love of my husband, family, and friends that supported me throughout my cancer journey.

So no, I didn’t forget about my diagnosis day – I was just out and about, busy living life. A life that I wasn’t sure I’d be able to live again a mere 4 years ago. So much of my life has changed since that fateful diagnosis day, and I couldn’t be more grateful for every tired morning, late night, sunburn, raindrop, and big breeze tangling my long, wavy hair.

Chemo Hair Loss

Figured now was as good a time as any to share this news…

After my last chemo, I started shedding a LOT of hair despite using the DigniCap scalp cooling system. What’s more, I developed a huge bald spot at the front of my hairline, and I got so frustrated that I had my mom cut all of my hair off in early May.

With my third chemo coming up tomorrow, I figured I should finally share what my hair looks like now. It’s not great, but it’s what I have for now.

I will continue using the DigniCap scalp cooling because despite developing a bald spot at the front and shedding a ton of hair, I so far have not developed additional bald spots. My hair mean(s/t) the world to me. It was absolutely beyond devastating to have to make this decision.

I am not happy that this had to happen. But without DigniCap, I would be completely bald right now otherwise. And I know this for a fact. So I’m extremely grateful to have the hair coverage I still do currently. I am also extremely blessed to still have my eyebrows and eyelashes as well as a mostly full head of hair, even if it is super duper short right now.

I’ve NEVER had hair this short in my life, so this was a complete change for me. I am so worried about the next four treatments. I have no idea how I’ll fare, if I’ll lose more hair, if I’ll lose my eyebrows or lashes, or what more is going to happen. Every new round of chemo is an absolute shitshow of “what else could go wrong this time?”.

All I can do is pray, hope for the best, and lean on all of you for your continued support. I can’t wait for time to pass to get healthy and have a full head of hair back in the future.

Anyway, just wanted to share that with all of you to rip the bandage off and so you’re not all shocked when I share pics from the next chemo session.

short hair
Short hair, do care